Sunday, February 5, 2012


So since my last post a lot has happened.
classes have started up again.
my best friend left for the Air Force and won't be back until August.
I submitted my applications to six different schools to transfer to in the fall. yea after all of that change I'm a little bit overwhelmed. Right now I am simply taking it one day at a time and cherishing each one because I realize that these days are limited. after this semester so many things in my life are going to change. I'm still not sure what my summer is going to consist of yet as far as jobs go and after that my younger friends are going off to college now too. Right when I'll be leaving for who-knows-what school, my best friend will be coming home and going to whichever school she decides on.Essentially it comes down to the fact that things are never going to be how they are at this point in my life again. I feel like I did at graduation last year but multiplied by ten. It really hit me hard when Samantha left for the Air Force last Sunday and this past week has just consisted of me coming to terms with all of this inevitable change that is coming up so fast.
I'm Changing.
My friends and family are changing.
Life is nothing but constant change and the faster I can accept that, the easier everything else will be.
I know things can't stay the same. I know that I need to move on, grow up and change.
I need to stop being afraid, and embrace everything that God
 throws at me.

Thursday, January 12, 2012


Well it's been quite the interesting week to say the least. my mind is reeling a mile per minute lately so its hard to know where to even begin. I've been so overwhelmed that i have moments where it's difficult to keep a thought together long enough to form coherent sentences.
essentially, the main questions that have been running through my mind boil down to the same ones we all ask ourselves at some point. I've been asking myself these questions without finding any answers for far too long.

WHAT do I want to do with my life?
WHO do I want in my life?
WHY do things happen the way they do?

The future is scary. not knowing the answers to these questions is scary. I'm in the process of finding myself. finally figuring out who I am and who I want to be. It's hard and it's confusing but I'm starting to realize that I need to listen to my gut instincts more. I need to start believing in myself.

One. Step. At. A. Time.

Monday, January 2, 2012


Dear 2012,
I know that the year before you had a lot of ups and downs, and i know that you might feel pressured to be just as varied, diverse and unpredictable as 2011 but believe me when i say that none of that will be necessary. Don't worry about comparing yourself to other years. please.
 2012, please be memorable, enlightening, breathtaking, different, adventurous, and full of love. i realize that this is a lot to ask so if some of those requests aren't possible, all i really want to say is...
2012 please be good to me.